It's just not my day

Why do people usually stressed out for ? Or what can you do when you're really in the end of the edge? Well . Normally people do cry , drink or etc to release themselves. I do understand people why they are doing this for. Because i'm one of them.

My practical exams in this week & theories exams in next week.

I'm a human being as well and also a guy who staying in this world for 18 years.

Somehow, I need to confess the words in my heart.

People around me might thought that I could be a person who don't really care about himself, fooling around with friends and don't really have problems. Friends that I used to share myself is not a lot. It's not even more than 10 fingers. I do care myself but not that much because I know it's gonna be a pressure for me. That's what makes me feel more comfortable and yes, I do have lots of problems.

Okay . What had happened on me was real bad for today.

I didn't face this kind of problem for a long time.

I did bad on the both practical subjects which are the kitchen and beverage exams.

I'm not gonna blame anyone for doing very bad performances today.

The question on my mind is the friends that I used to hang out with in college & had spent

most of the time in the college together but why did I done so bad compared to them ?

Everything is coming into my mind & I just couldn't accept it. It's not because they are better than me but why i'm not 1 of them ?

Eventually, i went to talk with the chef about the marks. I was asking for the changes about it & he said can't . At that moment, my tears were about dropping off so i just went straight to the toilet. It's because I didn't expect that it will be this bad until it makes me to ask for the mark changes.

I wanted to give up seriously. But when it comes to some certain things that you had already been thru like the friends you met, how much my parent had invested on me for the course & things like that and i had have to carry on. It's totally a big waste. Once I became a college student, I knew how expensive a course would be. Yes, I do have the right to stop now & my parent do allowed me with some nags. But when you looked around and seen someone who quit before, you might say something about that them & now the words have to go back to own self after you became 1 of them.

I'm supposed to help my friend in the kitchen for her class event in my college's training restaurant but I changed my mind after my kitchen exam. It's because i'm really afraid of having a hard time to think about my exam again. Seriously, it gave me a huge blast of it. It's exactly the same feeling when I lost in some great final competitions last time.

I don't usually feel disappointed if i didn't put any much hard work on it. But this time I did .

The more hard work you spend, the bigger disappointment you get.
Nobody knows what kind of person that someone will become in the future.

By the way, it's a new day and new month.

Happy Good December !